A few days ago I suddenly realised that I was getting angry about stuff, stupid stuff, important stuff in a stupid way, shouting at the telly, having arguments in my head with the Question Time panel. I find myself writing angry Twitter responses, then realise that I am behaving like a lot of other angry people, also realise that in 140 characters you can’t explain properly and end up thinking, ‘Oh whatever, I can’t be arsed’ and hit the delete button
It’s getting worse too, after all those comments I have made about how Moral Outrage has become the bane of all our lives with the increase of social media, all those little snowflakes who get shirty about the daftest things, I now realise that I am as bad as the rest of them, well at the moment anyway. I also found it difficult to meditate, my spiritual path has taken a back seat, my focus has gone and my head literally hurts.
Sooooo – I thought – Why does a usual fairly rational woman end up shouting ‘Yah Boo Sucks’ at the telly at people who couldn’t give a tinkers cuss about my opinions because they can’t hear them?
I could go into what makes me angry but to be honest, this anger is wearing me out and I know that I have to get some sort of a grip. Telling you about it will only make me more cross anyway. Obviously it could be my age, as a Crone I’m allowed to be cranky and tell it like it is which may mean my civility filter is on its way out. But, as this is an Astrology Blog, I decided to look at what was happening to me astrologically and Lo and Behold (goodness knows why I am so surprised) a list of transits all coming together at the same time that goes some way to explaining it although, I think age should still be factored in. Here they are, with my general interpretations and how I believe they are affecting me on a personal level.
Transiting Pluto sextile the Sun:
This is about transformation, it is a long term transit and the underlying lesson is that you have to lose yourself (Sun) before you can discover the new you.
At this moment I am in the process of reviewing certain things which are about deeply held beliefs and this is a, largely, unconscious process. These are being challenged and I am reacting in a way that my natal Pluto Square Mercury would describe. Pompous, unbelieving of others stupidity, I’m right you’re not. It is a tendency that I am aware of, which my Aquarian Mercury is constantly embarrassed by and which I have tried to temper for most of my adult life. It is also the reason for my strongly held political and spiritual beliefs.
Transiting Uranus square Uranus:
Love Uranus, he has bought me such excitement and insight and you may have noticed I bang on about him a lot on this Blog. A generational change and part of entering the 3rd age and showing that who you were is no longer advantageous. You need to become who you are at this time in your life.
I feel the process that I am going through at the moment means that I am letting go of an awful lot of dross, but it does hurt, especially with the Pluto control freakery at the same time. It is clouding my vision and distracting me from my plans, also there are little things that are going wrong all at once which is frustrating. What I have realised is, that all this anger about stuff I have very little control over is draining my energy and focus so I have none for the things that I can influence. Just got to get my head around that.
Transiting Saturn sextile Neptune:
Saturn/ Neptune – the time when you can make your dreams real, but you also have to discover what are your dreams and what are just illusions. That’s the painful part, the sacrificing of sacred cows.
I would love to make my living from Astrology but I need a steady income. I have reduced my working hours but is seems that various other duties again distract me from building what I really want, which makes me think I don’t want it enough or maybe I am just too tired at the moment. I have a strongly placed Saturn, which makes me resilient and dutiful, but risk averse. Perhaps I would just like a quiet life – I don’t know at the moment. However my advice to people going through this would be to keep in the familiar, so that is what I will do until I have more information.
Transiting Jupiter Square Jupiter:
When Jupiter gets involved with anything it just magnifies what is going on, I have been hoping I will get lucky with the lottery but it hasn’t happened yet. Good transits of Jupiter are an opportunity, so are difficult ones but these are usually hampered by a feeling of being trapped and so there is a tendency for knee-jerk reactions, hence the shouting at the TV.
I started writing this about a week ago and nothing much has changed, in fact in some areas it has got worse. However, to understand what is going on and to have some clarity about how I can deal with it, helps. Shout at the TV, ignore the news and social media when I am feeling at my worse (yeah! you can do that) and realising that eventually, there will be a new understanding and…yes.. as astrology has taught me, there is always an end to the cycle.
I know I am going through a transitional period at the moment, painful, embarrassing but also enlightening.